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Faking Bad/Quotes

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Independent Movie

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Minstrel Krampus

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:[Hayley tries to convince Steve of the perks associated with making fake IDs for herself and her friends] :Hayley: Alright, he'll do your IDs, but first he's got to do his day job. He's a licensed Federal Boobie Inspector. :[Steve pulls out his fake ID as a licensed Federal Boobie Inspector] :Steve: Ladies. :[Hayley's friends shrug their shoulders and lift their tops for Steve. Steve smiles for a moment and then pauses before addressing Hayley] :Steve: I'm taking on a lot of risk here. Do you mind asking them to jump up and down? ---- :[Bart Simpson orders a fake ID] :Steve: Mike Rotch? I'm looking for Mike Rotch? ---- :Klaus: So who's Guttenberg? Are you any closer? :Stan: Yes. He's a teenager, probably working with a sibling, but not a brother. He's from a two-parent home. Father is driven, but stunningly dim. Mother is all over the map, but hot. And there's something sexually ambiguous living in his attic. :Klaus: Yeah, those are the cold facts of his life, tell me about the man. Put it on the board, I'm a visual thinker. :Stan: Okay. He's smart [writes 'smart' on the whiteboard], he's tricky [writes 'tricky'], he's energetic [writes 'energetic], he's very energetic [puts 'very' above 'energetic'. The first letters of every word spells out 'Steve'] See, nothing! ---- :Hayley: Hey, buddy. :Steve: It's called "Fortress of Solitude", not "Fortress of Come-on-In". :Hayley: Oh right. Star Trek Wars...[pretends to shoot guns with her fingers] :Steve: I can't even... first of all... you're not... Ah! What do you want?

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Faking Bad

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