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Urza

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Urza was born in a city called Penregon, which can be located on a map in Silicon Valley somewhere. He had a younger, far cooler brother named Mishra, who had a talent for doing, while Urza had a reputation for thinking. Unfortunately, Urza's father had AIDS and thus the two brothers needed to be sent into the desert because their psychotic mother Hillary Clinton couldn't handle them.

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Urza was born in a city called Penregon, which can be located on a map in Silicon Valley somewhere. He had a younger, far cooler brother named Mishra, who had a talent for doing, while Urza had a reputation for thinking. Unfortunately, Urza's father had AIDS and thus the two brothers needed to be sent into the desert because their psychotic mother Hillary Clinton couldn't handle them. It was in the desert that both brothers developed a talent for digging and consuming, a somewhat widespread obscure practice in which the participants dig into the desert and eat whatever they can find. Consequently, the sport has caught on in Vermont, but however all they can find are rotten leaves and penguins.